


Bite Me

by AfraidOfLiving



Category: South Park
Genre: Monsters, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-24 18:23:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14959775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AfraidOfLiving/pseuds/AfraidOfLiving
Summary: A monster au for south park, where the boys find peace through each other, despite frequent challenges they face with their physical and magical features. all the identities are based on what I perceive them to be because of their emotions and physical attributes. some of the characters are "children of" monsters like Mothman, Boogeyman, and Medusa! Please leave comments and critiques! this is not a one chapter story as much as it may seem like it! its kids being kids and hanging out. some drama and clear conflict.





	1. Stoned

Craig was stone-faced. As usual, but today it was because of Kyle. The boys all wanted to see their hair, but neither Craig nor Kyle were willing to show something so private without proper payment. Kyle, begrudgingly, shrugged the hat off his head and lo and behold where brilliant red curls of snakes. They hissed and squeaked in the morning light, and one look at a glimmering serpent solidified Craig's entire body. Kyle screamed and Stan puked, Tweek spilled his coffee, and surprisingly Cartman seemed very interested. Tweek scrambled over, fear shaking his body. The young Cambion, Cartman, laughed and grinned at the perpetrator.

" Ha! Kahl killed Tweek's boyfriend!" Cartman snickered.  
"he's not my _boyfriend_ fatass!" Tweek had returned. He shivered and _begged_ Craig to respond as if his voice would help. It didn't.  
"I'm not fat!" he had retorted. Kyle groaned and put his hat back on, tucking in stray snakes. South Park's favorite Faun entered the scene to lighten the mood.  
"w-w-wow would you l-l-look at him. Never thought Craig would be the k-k-kind to get s-s-stoned." Jimmy stuttered.

This earned a chuckle from the group despite the situation. Token was dragged along, and Cartman made a snide comment about Tweek's sexuality. After many hours of trying new methods to get Craig back, Token sighed.  
"I can't believe you guys." He groaned. The Egyptian tied a relic from his cloak around Craig's waist and sat down beside Tweek. Tweek sat almost still for 3.5 seconds before screaming;  
"It isn't working! he's dead!" He twitched and bit at his hands. Cartman grinned and thumped him on the neck.  
"finally!" he grinned. Tweek glared as Cartman took a step back. He didn't need another bruise from everyone's favorite addict.  
"now where is his wallet-"

Suddenly, the stone began cracking. It started from his waist and once it moved to his neck you could clearly see the golden bangles he kept around his throat. his dark skin also became more obvious, and Tweek made an audible sigh of relief. Kyle did too, but he was a bit busy with holding Stan's bangs back. Jimmy made another drug pun about the cracks, and Cartman yanked his hand away. The stone now fell before Craig's feet as rubble, and he stood still for a moment as if the stone just changed color and Craig himself hadn't changed at all.  
"my hat." his words were barely audible.  
"what? I cant hear you" Cartman grinned.  
" **Get me my hat** "

Craig's jaw was set, and he looked a little regretful when Tweek ran to get it instead of a loser like Cartman. when he came back, however, Craig tugged the feathered item back on his head, and flipped the entire group off with all four of his middle fingers, attached to all four of his arms, all four adorned with gold bracelets and rings.  
the sun already began to set, and all the boys were ready to go to their respective homes. Token relished the time spent in his tomb, away from noise and annoyance. Craig couldn't wait to see his favorite show and tug each gold bracelet off of his body. Jimmy wanted to practice his comedy at home in front of his adoring fans (stuffed animals). Cartman knew of the fried chicken that awaited him at home. And Tweek, well, he needed more coffee after spilling it all over the undeserving snow.

"screw you guys-" Cartman began,  
"I'm going home."


	2. Morning beautiful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A peek inside the mornings of your favorite monster kids and their trouble with their individual traits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you didn't know, this is a peek into a few of the boys morning routine. you also get a sneak peek of what Tweek is! 
> 
> just to verify, each indented paragraph is a new POV, but still in the third person. (e.i Token to Clyde)

 

             If anything pissed off Craig more than his friends, it’s his family. Tricia came barging in at the ass crack of dawn, decorated in her own gold plates and bangles. She shouted for him to wake up, threatening to sacrifice him in his own temple if he didn’t come downstairs. Sluggishly, he did. And equally as begrudgingly he greeted his family with four middle fingers. He was always sooo happy to be the only one in his family to be able to flip four people off at once. He stumbled down the stairs, the stone scratching his heels and the scent of his mother’s cooking drifted through the kitchen and out the hallway. His fatigue seemed to fade as he sat down and a plate was set before him. His hair was raked back with a brush while his mother tied it back. Craig complained and growled at the poor excuse of a human sacrifice. It was just a pancake shaped like a person. A two-armed person. Lame. He had to be at his bus stop in almost an hour. it was unreasonably early to be up.

" stop complaining," his mother said.

" you act like you don't know how hard it is to put your hair in this headdress" she finished. Craig rolled his eyes and stuck his finger up at her for the second time. She lovingly returned the favor. once it was fit and his hair was tucked back, Craig went upstairs to complete the outfit. despite his incredible ability to not give a fuck, he still managed to look like he wanted to be presentable. The cape he wore was knotted around one shoulder, and the fabric was made of fine twisted fibers. compared to his fellow students he really was high class. it was funny to see Craig with his friends and their cotton T-shirts.  
Especially Tweek. Despite frequent offers, he refused to let Craig spend the time making (stealing) the cloth just so he didn't have to button his shirt. Tweek, was, well, unbelievable. in some cases. Considering south park was a place of monstrous nightmares, Tweek fit in. His parents especially loved Tweek. The moment Tweek almost gave Thomas Tucker a heart attack, he became like part of the family. After placing sandals on the floor and stepping into them comfortably, he ran downstairs to the door. his hand was inches away from the doorknob before his mind caught up with him. he dropped his bag, slipped off his shoes, and scrambled back upstairs.

"Craig Tucker where are you-"

Craig's mother couldn't finish before he shot back into his room towards the cage. Stripe was patiently waiting, clearly aware of Craig's mistake. Craig delicately opened the cage and filled his water back up to an appropriate amount. He placed a loving kiss on his guinea pigs head before returning him to his cage and wiping his expression back to a deadpan look. He retraced his steps, went back downstairs, and left his house.

 

 

                   Token was awoken by his queen, Nicole, to remind him to start the day off with something healthier than gourmet pancakes. He adored her, but today was special and he felt any kind of pancake was suitable. any kind of pancake that Clyde didn't cook. Clyde was not a cook. Clyde's food was nasty. Tokens nose scrunched up at the mere thought of his last meal with Clyde. Clyde also texted Token, but on much less adoring terms.

"Hey Dicktwitch can you ask your mom to make me pancakes too?" was the first thing he heard from Clyde when he picked up the phone.

"Yeah, um, but they'll be cold." Token reminded his friend. he went easy on Clyde, he's not very bright.

"use one of your spells. like the one that helped Craig?" He pleaded.

" The only person who could manage stone pancakes is you, Clyde. besides, that's a magic thing. Cooking isn't magic."

 

 _That's what you think._ clyde thought. he ended the call with his bestest friend and assumed he would supply the goods before it got cold. Not that he wouldn't eat them cold, of course.

Clyde was an idiot. _I'm a genious,_ he thought. His pride was a big helper in his idiocy. but, despite this, or maybe because of this, he had a huge heart. His lack of "left brain interference" got in the way of things. Like rational thought, grades, his relationships, grades... But! nonetheless, he was loved by many.

despite his big ass claws.

The Japanese girls in his classes called them- what was it? he pulled the paper from his backpack where he wrote it down in case it was cool. Yaoi hands? yeah, those. and he had a lot of fur. it was a burden of beauty, he would say.

"It's annoying and it's on my carpet" Craig would say. Him and his fabrics, jeez. Craig was so gay that drag queens complain about him in political seminars. Admittedly, _he_ didn't think of that comeback. But he was certainly louder than the person who did! Craig was also Clydes bestest friend. Token is still his bestest friend, dummy, but he needs to win Craig back. Ever since Craig had been widening his friend horizon, it took a turn for the worst. _It took a gay turn._ he's been guilt-tripping him with Token, and it's totally working! Craig hangs out with Thomas a lot less, and loads more with Tweek! Tweek is much closer to Clyde, which means Craigs closer too! All in a days work. All of Clyde's planning put him back to sleep, and he woke back up at 20 minutes past 6 and had three minutes to get to his stop. If this didn't send Clyde into a panic, nothing would.

 

 

                Clyde met Craig near the stop, dressed in his fabrics, yet again. All nice and shiny. This made Clyde very upset. but whatever, he would suppress even the urge to rant about the cruel world in favor of his bestest friend.

        While waiting at the stop, a fog grew. thick and clouding their vision. Clyde's voice lowered and his breathing sped a mile a minute to grasp for rapidly disappearing oxygen. he was so confused. was this a trick? His heart stopped, and at the same time, it raced. the snow blended in with the fog, the clouds above drifted lower to grab the ground. the eerie atmosphere sent Clyde into yet another panic. _what was happening? Is he gonna be ok? when is lunch?_ a piercing scream erupted from some hoarse boys vocal cords, somehow still quiet and loud like he was thinking the sound up. through the mist emerged a very- oh.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I have a Tumblr where you can give me suggestions! @AfraidOfLiving! I take suggestions and critiques, and this story has angst, but it's also sweet and they bond. I haven't seen many monster au stories where they hang out and do monster stuff. clyde, wendy, and Kenny are in the later chapters.


End file.
